When in the process of creating and improving my magazine advertisement up to the same standard as my CD digipak, I consulted my lecturer who then referred my work to a Graphic Designer, who was able to give me some tips on how to improve. It just needed fine-tuning, therefore gaining a professional opinion was really helpful to me, as both the compliments and advice I was given enabled me to improve my design and also grow as a designer myself. Below is the feedback that I received on my magazine advertisement at the stage that it was in the image:
RE: Design, it's pretty impressive. I think it's mainly a case of being a bit more practical. At the moment the main headline screams 'new album' but I don't know who it's by - the artist name and 'new album' should be more equally weighted. So maybe have "THE NEW ALBUM BY JONATHAN GRAY" or something as the main headline, and make the 'stellar' review a bit easier to read too - it's very quiet. I think the shot of the chap and the tree is ok but the cut-out at the bottom is a bit clunky - maybe make the photo bleed off the bottom of the page so the bottom of the tree isn't visible - the text along the bottom can stay where it is but can be overlaid on top of a strip of white/semi transparent colour so that it's still readable over the pic behind it...
After reading this I felt confident that my underlying layout and basic design were successful, and that I could change a few things in order to make it that bit more refined. I took this advice on board and changed the main sell line from 'THE NEW ALBUM' to simply 'JONATHAN GRAY', which I feel is far more effective and contributes to bringing the album cover and the magazine ad together as two texts from the overall image of the artist.
I was really pleased to see that the majority of the people I asked recognized my video as being from the Alternative/Indie genre, which I was surprised at as I had assumed that the genre wasn't easily distinguishable. Many of the people I asked picked up on the costume of the main character Jonny, which was also reassuring as it showed me that I had made the right choice in terms of costume and props, adding to the mise en scene of my video and contributing to the overall image that I wanted to create to portray the genre. In order to help me to consolidate my findings, I created a summary sheet that details what I found, so I could then evaluate this and reflect upon my final pieces and the feedback that I received for them.
From this feedback I have definitely learnt that the main issue that I had with the video, the portrayal of my storyline, was one of the main areas that people believe I have gone wrong. Something as emotional as a break-up needs to be portrayed in a more emotional way, which evidently I have not done. Although simplicity was my aim, I feel that if I had a chance to improve upon my video, I would design a chronological structure that I would make obvious by incorporating the female character into the video a bit more, showing their crumbling relationship. Furthermore, I would perhaps pick one other location, such as their house, to film some scenes from the past, which I could have displayed in black and white, distinguishing it as a flashback to happier times in their relationship, or perhaps when things started to go downhill.
I only included a few shots that attempted to portray the storyline, as shown below. These were the shots that my respondents picked up on as contributing to how the characters portrayed the storyline. I feel that these were successful, however I should have included more of them in order to make my video a lot more obvious, whilst still trying to stay true to the simplistic nature of an Indie/Alternative music video.
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